So a couple weeks ago I got an email from one of my blog followers. He explained that his wife had battled mesothelioma several years ago so he knew first hand the struggles one faces as they try to be a caregiver to a loved one. Cameron asked if I would be open to him writing a short article about his experiences that I could then post on my blog. Needless to say I was delighted!
Below is what Cameron sent. I have only quickly checked out his blog, but it's clear he is on a real mission to share his story and do what he can to make a difference. I posted the link at the end of his article and would encourage you to check it out!!! Thank you Cameron for taking a moment to contact me and for sharing your passion about helping families and caregivers through their experiences and emotions as they offer support on a cancer journey. Maybe together we CAN make a difference!
Caregiving For a Cancer Patient
On November 21, 2005 my wife Heather was diagnosed with malignant pleural mesothelioma,
a form of cancer that would put us on the battlefield for the next several
years as we tried to overcome it. To Heather, her diagnosis was so frightening
that she couldn’t say anything after the doctor told her the diagnosis. The
news came just three months after one of the happiest moments of our lives, the
birth of our first and only child, Lily.
The doctor was reading off our options for treatment and
telling us where we could go to get help. It was either a local hospital, a
regional hospital further away, a treatment center in Boston, where we could
see a renowned mesothelioma specialist named Dr. Sugarbaker. I just wanted to get Heather the very best
treatment available. I turned to the doctor and said, “Get us to Boston!”
The next few months were a whirlwind of doctor’s
appointments, traveling to and from Boston, and handling Heather’s condition as
best as possible. I learned to be her constant caretaker, even as I had to work
a full-time job and raise our infant daughter. The pressures of being a new
father, a full time caregiver and the sole provider for my family were
enormous, and I frequently found myself overwhelmed and breaking down under the
responsibility.
There were moments during Heather’s illness where I would go
off by myself to cry. I didn’t know how to handle what was happening around
me. Medical bills steadily piled up and
I feared we wouldn’t be able to pay them all.
I constantly feared that I would lose my wife and be left a poor,
widowed single father. I cried to myself though, never letting Heather see my
moments of weakness. In Heather’s condition she wasn’t in any shape to deal
with these things I kept them hidden from her as much as I could. It was her
health that was first in our lives. She HAD to beat cancer!
I learned several lessons as a caregiver that helped me make
it through. First and foremost, I learned to let go of my pride and ask for
help. Our friends and family came to our aid in our darkest time, providing
everything from a shoulder to cry on, to desperately needed financial
assistance. I learned to let myself be weak at times. Bad days are inevitable in a situation like
this and you can’t fight them. Let them happen, but never let yourself give up
hope. Hope is your greatest weapon in this fight.
Over the following months, Heather would undergo extensive
and difficult treatment for mesothelioma. Against all odds, with the help and
support of our loving community and the care of our incredible doctors, Heather
was able to beat mesothelioma, a rare feat accomplished by far too few. Today,
over seven years since her diagnosis, she is healthy and cancer free.
Caring for someone with cancer requires a total commitment,
a strong will, and a strong heart. I didn’t start the journey with those
things, but now that Heather is cancer free and watching our daughter grow up,
I am proud to say that I have grown as a person. I hope that by sharing our
story of success over this ugly cancer I can help another currently in their
own battle today.
Cameron Von St. James
http://www.mesothelioma.com/blog/authors/cameron/
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